Inner-Self Workings

A play by Daniel Lang

Characters:

Companionship- an eager, charming, and energetic youth. Has a restless and playful personality. Dressed in a tee-shirt and Jeans

Love- An elegant woman. She is the only female in the company. She dresses appropriately, but is also very attractive. Often joked upon by the employees.

Food- A lethargic and obese man. Most of his sentences are broken up by irritatingly loud wheezes. All his actions are extremely sloppy and very disgusting.  

Drink- A man who constantly feels he has somewhere to go. He is a sporadic, yet understanding man. Is constantly walking around the room except when it indicates that he’s sitting. Wears a blue collared shirt without a tie

Possession- Very quiet. Timid. White collar shirt without a tie

Achievement- Upbeat, Confident, and diligent. Very fancy clothes.

Setting: 

Employee lounge. Contains a couch toward left stage, large table with five chairs in the center, a water cooler toward right stage, a fridge lower left stage. (Other props such as large desks and cabinets may be placed anywhere the producer sees fit. It is optional, but preferred.)

Lights come on and Love is lying on the couch in a very relaxed pose. Companionship is reclining on a chair at the center. His feet are resting on the table. He is frequently tossing a small ball into the air and catching it as it falls.

COMPANIONSHIP: O, c’mon. You hadn’t even applied for this job until recently. I’ve been here since this company was 3 years old and you know how important experience is for a profession.

LOVE: (sigh) Do you mind? I am trying to relax.

COMPANIONSHIP: Relax. Let me tell you something about relaxing. (He rises slowly getting louder) Every night we have a window. A break that lasts for about four to seven hours. You know what we do during this break? Nothing. We always sit down, relax and keep silent.

LOVE: Okay, you really want to talk?

COMPANIONSHIP: Yes!!!

LOVE:  What do you want talk about?

COMPANIONSHIP: (almost shouting) Haven’t you been listening? I wanna know who’s more important to this company.

LOVE: What do you mean?

COMPANIONSHIP: (suddenly getting calmer) You know…like who’s needed more?

LOVE: Who’s needed more?

COMPANIONSHIP: Yeah

LOVE: Well, we’re all important…

COMPANIONSHIP: But who do you think is most important?

LOVE: (pauses) I really don’t know……..I think I am very important…..

COMPANIONSHIP: Well, I am more important of course. Duh. I have been here longer and the company needs me more.

LOVE: Ever hear of the term “quality not quantity?”

COMPANIONSHIP: (mocking) Blahlity not blahtity. What do you contribute to this company that I don’t? I set up outside connections with other companies and we all benefit from each other. What do you do?

LOVE: I….I make connections too….

COMPANIONSHIP: O Yea, with whom?

LOVE: (sitting up)….I try to set up meetings with the other companies. I establish a place where we companies can congregate and…..it’s a very private matter.

COMPANIONSHIP: (whispers) Yeah, connections with my butt…

LOVE: (quickly stands up suddenly offended) Excuse ME?!

COMPANIONSHIP bursts into laughter

LOVE: How repulsive! How dare you?

COMPANIONSHIP: (gradually finishes laughing) I am sorry. Really I am, but you barely even do anything for this company.

Love: How untrue! You’re disgusting!

Loud and slow foot steps appear, followed by an odor which the characters’ notice.

COMPANIONSHIP: (frowning) Great! (Whispering) Speaking of disgusting….

Food Enter. He’s loudly munching on a bag of chips.

FOOD: Uh…hey guys.

COMPANIONSHIP and LOVE: (unenthusiastically) Hey Food.

FOOD: (finishing his bag of chips) Awww, I am out of chips. Wonder if we got something in the fridge.

Food begins searching in the fridge. While his back is turned, Love and Companionship begin shooting each other funny and disgusting faces and pointing at Food. They laugh silently at one another. Food finds a subway sandwich, takes it out of the fridge, and sits down at an empty seat at the table.

FOOD: OOOOO, pastrami with lettuce!

He takes a huge bit out of the sandwich and gets mustard on his hand. He wipes his hand on his shirt which causes a yellow stain to appear. Food shrugs and continues eating.

COMPANIONSHIP: (inconspicuously takeing a seat as far away to FOOD as possible) Hey….um…Food. I’ve got a question for you.

FOOD: MMM? (Still eating the subway)

COMPANIONSHIP: Yea…um….do you think you’re the most important member of this company?

FOOD: (stops eating to think) Oh…Well, of course I do.

COMPANIONSHIP: (excitedly) Oh really, Why?

FOOD: Cause this company needs me.

COMPANIONSHIP: For what?

FOOD: Well, to increase our intake in profit. (continues to eat)

COMPANIONSHIP: Ahh, but you cannot do your job without me.

FOOD: (belches) Is that so?

COMPANIONSHIP: Yea. I connect with other companies. These companies help join to make a healthy profit for all of us.

FOOD: But who’s the one that has to make sure we receive the money we need?

COMPANIONSHIP: Uh…yours I am guessing?

FOOD: Mhm hmm. (continues to take big bites from the sandwich)

(There’s a brief pause in the room due to the stupefaction of Food’s intake)

COMPANIONSHIP: Uh, don’t you think you should slow down bud? Too much consumption of the wrong thing can’t be good.

FOOD: It hasn’t killed us yet...

Drink enters the room quickly. He searches in need of a drink. He considers the water at the water cooler, but decides to check the fridge. While he’s in the fridge the others in the room look at each other, confused. Drink pulls a coke out of the fridge, opens it up, and chugs half of it.

DRINK: Ahhhhh. So much better. Hey, what’s up guys?

LOVE: Ummm. Pardon me in asking this, but wasn’t that a little strange?

DRINK: Hmmm. I guess it was. I just needed to wash my throat. My apologies. Hey, I was wondering, where….

FOOD: Hey Drink, we were discussing something interesting. Do you want to join the conversation?

DRINK: Sure, I guess I can spare a minute. (takes a seat at the table) What are you guys discussing?

COMPANIONSHIP: We’re talking about who’s most important to this company.

DRINK: Well, we’re all considered important here, but I think my role is very important…

FOOD: (laughs) Please. What could be more important than making money? Hahahaha.

DRINK: (pauses) Regulating the money correctly around the company?

FOOD: But you cannot do that if you do not make money…

COMPANIONSHIP: Which cannot be done without me.

FOOD: (shouting and standing up) There are many more ways (belches) to make money than through your silly connections.

COMPANIONSHIP: (also standing and shouting) Is that right, big fella?

LOVE: Now, now…(stands up) we don’t have to start anything, do we?

Possession begins to slowly creep in to the room and make his way towards the water cooler while the fight is still going on.

DRINK: She’s right. Companionship, calm down.

COMPANIONSHIP: Look Drink, I respect you and all, but I can’t respect this guy if he doesn’t respect me.

Possession reaches the water cooler and begins to drain water into a cup.

DRINK: I know, but you also…..

Everyone hears the bubbling caused by the water cooler. They just realized Possession was in the room. They all begin to stare at him. When finished filling his cup, Possession realizes everyone is staring at him.

POSSESSION: Oh…..I…I am sorry. I just came for some water. I’ll be on my way.

COMPANIONSHIP: Wait!!! (extending his arm out to Possession) Maybe you could help us.

POSSESSION:….Really?...

COMPANIONSHIP: (puts his arm around Possession) Sure just answer this question (pause) Do you think you’re most important to this company?

POSSESSION: I…I don’t really know…

COMPANIONSHIP: It’s not that hard. What do you do?

POSSESSION: I….I…decide which products we….we need to sell.

COMPANIONSHIP: Now do you think that’s important?

POSSESSION: (pause) I think so…

LOVE: Why do you think it’s important?

POSSESSION: (taciturnly) Because…. I decide what we sell….and that’s how we make money.

COMPANIONSHIP: See Food? Another perfectly good reason. Are you going to discredit that too?

FOOD: No. But I still think that I am more important.

(All sit down in their original seats. Possession begins to leave the room.)

DRINK: (to Possession) You can stay you know.

Possession shrugs and sheepishly sits next to Food. He takes a particular interest in the ball Companionship tosses around. Companionship takes notice of that.

COMPANIONSHIP: Here you want this ball?

Possession looks away.

COMPANIONSHIP: It’s yours.

Companionship rolls the ball to him and Possession decides to take it. Possession is much more relaxed because of this.

FOOD: Look, Selling products is important, but we need to produce money…

DRINK: You know, there are more important things than the necessity of our jobs…

FOOD: Like What?

DRINK: (stands up and begins to pace) Like work ethic.

FOOD: Work ethic?

DRINK: Yea, like efficiency in your work.

FOOD: Efficiency? Who cares about efficiency?! As long as the jobs done and through I am happy.

DRINK: Don’t you think you’re being a little selfish?

FOOD: (beginning to shout) Hey, I wouldn’t be talking about efficiency if I was you…

DRINK: (stops pacing and stares at Food) What do you mean?

FOOD: You and your movements. It’s a wonder you get anything done.

COMPANIONSHIP: Ha, says the glutton. At least he moves…

Love and Possession chuckle in their spots.

FOOD: (infuriated) What did you call me? (at Possession) What do you think is so funny? (at everyone) You know what, if it wasn’t for me none of you would have any value and would have….

Achievement knocks on the door and without a response, slides into the room.

ACHIEVEMENT: Hey, did you guys hear about my party I am throwing for…what’s going on in here?

DRINK: We’re having a debate going on.

ACHIEVEMENT: (excited) Oooooo on what? (Takes a seat in the last chair. Everyone should be sitting again)

COMPANIONSHIP: We’re debating who’s most important….

ACHIEVEMENT: Well that’s not hard at all. Of course I am the most important. (all characters groan)

ACHIEVEMENT: Why is that so hard to understand?

COMPANIONSHIP: Because no one knows what you do?

ACHIEVEMENT: Another easy question. I raise the spirits of this company to perform at its best….

FOOD: Okay, what does that even mean?

COMPANIONSHIP: (shouting) Look, I am most important.

All characters except for Love begin to yell at each other in their sitting position. Possession hangs his head.

COMPANIONSHIP: Connections are most important. I keep companies together. We all benefit from each other. We each give and sell to each other. It’s very important….

FOOD: This company cannot survive without money. Who keeps the money coming? Me! Who makes sure there’s profit? Me! How can you say you’re more important than me…